Chevalier Alternative 20 Part II


“I had my suspicions. Anyway, I’ve decided to give up on HARD YURI and go STRAIGHT.”


Robin feels the first pangs of jealousy.


“I guess next you’re going to tell us you’re into queens?”


“There’s nothing shameful in royalcon! Marie and Charlotte are very beautiful women!”


Robespierre prepares to test a new type of Pleasure.


Lorenza offers to help out.


“All right, brace yourself.”


“She never does that for me.”


“On second thought, it looks a bit messy.”


“Ah yes, that feels good!”


“Thank you, Lorenza.”


Robespierre’s inner BI self awakens.


“Alas, it seems that Durand has died. That leaves me short one HARD GAY partner.”


“I should really make a list of potential replacements; Broglie, do you know anyone who would be interested in HARD GAY with their King?”


“I really can’t think of anyone close by who would fit the bill.”


“Well, sir, perhaps I could-”


“Well, I guess there’s nothing for it. Pass me your stick- I will have to make do with that instead.”


“Dear director, I would like to propose a new series entitled Anna’s Adventures in Versailles.”


“Hooray, she’s going to get us starring roles in a new show!”


“Wait…what do you mean I won’t be in it?”


“Sorry kid, but show business is a harsh world- I have to look out for myself.”


“Anna, do not do anything rash. I magically know that d’Eon is coming back to France, so you will get plenty of screen time soon.”


“Of course, I should warn you that he will not have been with a woman for a long time.”


“So you’re saying he’ll have missed me a lot?”


“No, I mean he’s HARD…ah, well, perhaps it’s best you find out for yourself.”


Anna is bemused and confused by Marie’s words, but is sure everything will work out in the end.


(“Poor girl, she doesn’t even know what HARD GAY is.”)


D’Eon writes a treatise on how the book of HARD GAY will revolutionise the lives of men everywhere.


“Hmm, I wonder if the techniques I learned in England and Russia will be considered acceptable in France?”


Teillagory shows off his ‘sword’ to some able seamen.


Robin realises that a boat is not the best environment in which to give up HARD GAY.


D’Eon thinks back to a time when he tried to confess his gender preferences to Anna.


“Anna, I really need to tell you something. You see, I’m HARD-“


“You’ve fallen hard in love with me, right?”


“I really should tell her the truth sometime, but the longer I leave it, the harder it gets.”


Back in France, the Musketeers stop off at an inn, and are given HARD GAY tokens.


“Here, I won’t be needing these.”


“It says on here that we can get a night of HARD GAY for free! Are you sure you don’t want to join in, Robin?”


“I told you- I’m not interested in that sort of thing anymore.”


“Poor boy- he’s at a difficult age.”


“Everyone acts as if this is just a phase I’m going through, but I really want to be STRAIGHT from now on.”


Teillagory hands the innkeeper a list of HARD GAY partners that he would like to try out.


Old instincts draw Robin to his former partner.


“Stop resisting, Robin, and come to bed with me.”


“No, I mustn’t- I am STRAIGHT now.”


“Heh heh, you’ll come back to uncle Teilla soon enough.”


“No human partner could be more HARD GAY than this book.”


D’Eon sees a vision of the intense Pleasure session that claimed the life of his sister.


“Gwakakaka.”


“Is everyone in this series secretly evil?”


“So anyway, we need to discuss Robin- the poor boy has convinced himself he’s STRAIGHT!”


“Well, as you know, I myself am BI; I don’t see any harm in liking women as long as he doesn’t go off men.”


“I can’t help feeling that it’s your BI views that have corrupted the poor boy- why, I myself felt a brief attraction to women after seeing you in that dress.”


“BI is the future; pure HARD GAY is outdated.”


“HARD GAY is timeless! A sword is what a man needs, not all this fiddling around with soft melons!”


“Foolish old man, depriving yourself of a more varied experience.”


“Should I really give up HARD GAY entirely?”


“We did have some good times, after all.”


“What do you mean, I don’t have a partner for tonight?”


“I’m sorry, but we don’t need BI trash like you here.”


“Okay everyone, don’t forget your dance steps.”


“Are these your new lovers, Teillagory?”


“Time to show you some old-fashioned swordsmanship!”


Teillagory forces his ‘sword’ on d’Eon.


“Put that broken antique away- you’re embarrassing yourself!”


“BI is the future! You can’t go back to the old days now!”


“Orleans! I thought you had been written out already!”

“Not at all, I was just having a relaxing holiday in Ireland.”


“Whilst there, I became the medium for four Rozen Maidens.”


“My lord, we have restrained the BI man and are awaiting your orders.”


“Teillagory! I saw you bowing to a strange man in the OP, but I never once suspected you!”


“Don’t worry, d’Eon- a few nights with Orleans will knock those BI tendencies out of you.”

“NOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!”

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3 Responses to Chevalier Alternative 20 Part II

  1. Dominique says:

    “Whilst there, I became the medium for four Rozen Maidens.”

    BEST. LINE.

  2. dmjewelle says:

    I think my stomach just ruptured from the laughing. XD

  3. youdig says:

    Oh, it’s gorgeous! You did such a hilarious job. I was laughing to choke.
    Yeah for robespierre, the hottest HARD GAY of our time. Ep 21 will be……you know what I mean about those two.^^

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