There’s a new genius in town; his name is Pang Tong and he has a fondness for bondage. Can Pang Tong convince Wu and Wei to adopt his ways, or will the classic techniques win out over whips and chains?
The important thing is to never resist Cao Cao’s advances.
“All in the name of Pleasure.”
“Still, once the HARD GAY is over, he can look back on the memories of Cao Cao’s Sword and smile.”
“When you said you had a flaming stick to douse in my cool waters, I thought you were talking figuratively!”
“I only wanted HARD GAY with you!”
“This time I promise to give you proper HARD GAY!”
“Are you sure? Last time you let me get my Sword out and then you left me naked in the bedroom for hours!”
“Had I realised you were expecting HARD GAY, I never would have left you like that!”
“Very well, we shall speak no more of this embarrassing matter.”
“Did you hear? Zhuge Liang has invited Pang Tong into his bedchamber!”
“Your HARD GAY prowess is well known throughout the lands.”
“Ah yes, but I heard you were having some trouble in that department- have you managed to overcome it yet?”
“I can’t keep any secrets from you, can I- no matter how embarrassing they are.”
“I have taught Zhou Yu to be a good, submissive lover in the bedroom.”
“He is? That’s good to hear!”
“In the past, Zhou Yu invited me to have HARD GAY with him, but I was unsure of his skill.”
“The same goes for Cao Cao- it’s just so hard to find a man who meets my exacting standards.”
“Sir, Pang Tong has finally agreed to HARD GAY with us!”
“Really? I’ve waited and hoped for this for so long.”
“We shouldn’t waste any time- bring him to my bedchamber at once.”
“Once I take Pang Tong as my lover, I can dump Zhuge Liang!”
Zhou Yu begins seducing Pang Tong by plying him with wine.
“I, er, I mean all the men here would love to see you in my, um, their beds.”
“I can see you desperately want to sleep with me, Zhou Yu, but I can only have HARD GAY with you if you’ll agree to bondage.”
“Bondage, you say?”
Elsewhere, a party of minor characters tries to have group Pleasure without hurting each other.
Taishi Ci, in vacant and motionless mode.
“Please join our Group Pleasure.”
“I shall inform Cao Cao that group sessions have great potential.”
I’ve missed the constant references to chaos.
Cao Cao is surprised when Pang Tong arrives and asks to be his lover.
“Zhou Yu is such an old stick-in-the-mud; he promised me HARD GAY but when I suggested bondage he rejected me!”
“I can see, however, that you are a man who is open to trying new techniques.”
“Gwakakakakaka! This is the best day of my life!”
“I always used to worry that my HARD GAY wasn’t quite good enough, but now that Pang Tong himself has praised my Pleasuring skills, I can have confidence in myself.”
“Still, I’m a little worried that my men aren’t used to HARD GAY at sea.”
“If we use my chains of bondage, this won’t be a problem, and HARD GAY and HORSE can proceed as they would on land.”
“I like the sound of that!”
“There’s no time to waste- I must try bondage immediately!”
Another of Pang Tong’s conquests appears.
“Are you servicing Cao Cao these days?”
“It’s true that he and I are lovers now…”
“…but it’s just sex- Liu Bei is the only man I can ever truly love.”
Cao Cao organises a mass HARD GAY session.
“What are you saying? A thousand men is nowhere near enough to satisfy my appetite!”
“Very well, then what about two thousand?”
“That’s still insufficient!”
“Plus I’ll need some lovers who are more skilled than the average generic, or I’ll get bored.”
“Oh, all right then, I’ll make it three thousand- no man can surely service more than that.”
“I must mention that many men are beginning to find Zhou Yu’s HARD GAY unsatisfactory.”
“I’m sure I can convince them to become your lovers instead.”
“You’ll have a harem, and Zhou Yu will be stuck with only Hyper Self Pleasure!”
“Damn you” was judged to be too offensive.