I hate to admit it, but last night I watched an episode of…Lucky Star. No, I haven’t been infected by neural parasites, but I realise that I needed to at least sample it before I write the KyoAni review I keep promising. Thankfully, it wasn’t as bad as feared, but nor can I call it good- instead it plays, and I remain completely indifferent to it. For this reason, I watch one episode per night right before sleep, for it gets my mind into shutdown mode.
Shounen Onmyouji X Dennou Coil
An unlikely pairing, perhaps, but this crossover was suggested with but one aim in mind- the alliance of Isako and Kazane. Whilst Isako takes the role of chief villain in the series, Kazane becomes her loyal underling, and together the two girls achieve the one thing most villains cannot- they actually manage to take over the world. Can anyone stand against the combination of futuristic encoder techniques and the onmyou magic of historical fantasy? Find out on Dennou Onmyouji, aka Shounen Coil!
Ridiculous gaming challenges
- Final Fantasy 7: Complete game with initial equipment, no materia and if possible no item use or levelling up.
- Final Fantasy 8: Complete game with no junctioning, weapon remodelling or advanced limit breaks (i.e. ones that require special items or weapon upgrades to learn).
- Disgaea: Complete game with only story characters and prinnies, or for an added challenge, only prinnies.
- Phantom Brave: Complete game with only Marona- no confining allowed. Weaker gamers may heal and buy weapons on the island.
- Ratchet and Clank: Complete games with only the wrench, except where a specific weapon or gadget is absolutely necessary to advance the series.
- .hack: Complete all four games with Kite alone (with initial equipment), except for when other characters must come along to advance the story. For added challenge, do not use items or skills, and only save at the end of each game. Grunties are not allowed.
- Final Fantasy Tactics: Complete game with only story characters and the generics you are given at the beginning of the game; or better yet, with only Ramza and guest characters (you may bring out one more character when two squads are needed). No class changes are allowed.
- Final Fantasy X: Complete game without using the Sphere Grid at all. Summons are not allowed.
- Final Fantasy X-2: Complete game with default dresspheres.
- Legend of Dragoon: Complete game without Additions or Dragoon transformations.
Shining Tears X Wind 9
Of course you can, that’s the essence of HARD GAY.
“I’ll have sex with anything that’s got a pulse!”
“Take my giant Sword!”
Ah, another suggestive title.
When Fruit Attack
First a pineapple launches its assault.
“Don’t tell me it’s embarrassing to be seen fighting fruit!”
“See how you like it!”
Bananas rise up for the second wave.
“We’re sick of being in so many banana peel jokes! How do you think we feel when the poor sap treads on us?”
“…even these fruit are deadly.”
Random Thoughts: Liu Bei
Following our exclusive interview with Zhuge Liang, we were given the chance to talk to Liu Bei himself! Liu Bei, how do you respond to accusations that your role in the Three Kingdoms era has been exaggerated to make you seem more righteous?
How dare you even suggest that my adventures in the novel and ROTK anime are less than one hundred percent realistic!? They are an exact portrayal of honourable and righteous nature, for I, Liu Bei, can do no wrong!
You did spend rather a lot of time in ROTK running away, though.
It’s called strategy- were I a lesser man, I would call you an asinine fool right now, but I am too kindly for that.
Ah yes, of course- but if you are indeed as honourable as you claim, why did you dash your son to the ground after Zhao Yun went to the effort of rescuing him?
I can make any number of children, but Zhao Yun is the one of a kind lover no man wants to surrender easily. Ah, the nights spent impaled on his Spear- good times, good times.
Okay then, moving on- why do you look so much like a girl in Koutetsu Sangokushi? Are you in fact meant to be a woman in that series?
Look, I’ll level with you- the royalties from Dynasty Warriors aren’t all that great now that there are so many playable characters, and my last steady employment was in a 1991 anime. If I’m getting paid, then Iâ€™ll wear any costume- even chest padding and a pink afro.
And finally- is Zhuge Liang really all that Zhuge?rnHeâ€™s Zhuger than you can imagine.rnrn
This Week in Anime
Tomato suffers unfortunate fate.
Plush prinnies spotted.
Vegetables have a conference.
“Which vegetables should I choose?”
“Let’s go with these Sunrise-grown magic mushrooms!”
“Get your nondescript red fruit here!”
Darker than Black- an equal opportunities advertiser for fast food franchises.
No matter who or what you are, fruit is always watching you.
“Yeah, I caught these oranges trying to sneak in to our home.”
A new record is set for coffee milk drinking.
Anime World Tour: Koutetsu Sangokushi
Journey back to a very unique interpretation of 3rd century China, one which will let you view your beloved Three Kingdoms era in a whole new light. In this alternate world, women have been replaced with good looking and virile young men, all seeking to get in bed with each other- and what’s more, they even have special magic devices to enhance their HARD GAY! Whether you fancy the flower gardens of Wu, the castle pleasure boats of Wei, or the gentle riversides or Shu, we have settings and men to suit every single taste! Sadly, however, we cannot admit women into our Pleasure paradise- please apply elsewhere.
OST spotlight: Final Fantasy X
Nobuo Uematsu is joined by two other composers on this soundtrack, resulting in a score that is “the same but different” as compared to its predecessors- the FF feel remains, but now there is a higher proportion of bold brass-led themes, and even an attempt at heavy metal. It is in the more introspective pieces that the OST does its best, however, with some simple yet memorable piano pieces standing out from the crowd. A fitting soundtrack to mark how FFX made the transition to a new console whilst retaining links to what had come before.
Notable tracks: To Zanarkand, Normal Battle, Summoned, Silence Before the Storm, The Splendid Performance, Brass de Chocobo, Attack, Path of Repentance, Suteki da ne, Decisive Battle, Ending Theme
Mini-editorial: spoiled by subs?
Although it may seem unfashionable to dig up that old subs vs. dubs issue, this week I want to follow on from the comments here to ask if an increased exposure to subbed anime lowers one’s tolerance for dubs, and if one can (or would even want to) go back.
Now, back in the early years of my proper anime addiction, slow internet at home and university rules on peer-to-peer programs meant that fansubs were neglected, leaving DVDs and TV broadcasts as my primary form of exposure. Back in those days, I would happily watch most dubs with little complaint, only switching to Japanese audio on the second viewing for DVDs.
In time, however, all that changed- combined exposure to fansubs and some awful dubs (Tenjho Tenge, for one), saw me switching to the Japanese audio immediately, to the point where it seemed wrong to even accidentally hear a line of English audio. Voice acting which had once been acceptable or even pleasing to the ears was now grating and painful to experience, and the thought of watching English language broadcasts on TV nigh untenable. Somehow, it didn’t seem so bad when playing games, but anime was now to be experienced in Japanese only.
Ultimately, then, are Japanese voice actors so much better than their English counterparts that listening them is akin to tasting fresh bread after years of stale toast, preventing one from ever going back? Is it just that the budget for dubbing anime is too low to allow for higher standards to be achieved? Do we get so tired of the same old set of voices that we simply cannot countenance hearing them over and over? Is it just better to always listen to things in their original language where possible (after all, would anyone want to try the likes of The Simpsons in Japanese for more than novelty purposes?).
In Your Reflection
This week we have a head-to-head between two mysterious red-haired bishies- Toya from Ceres, Celestial Legend and Mansairaku from the Tokyo arc of Otogi Zoshi. Both have a romantic connection with the female lead, and start off assisting her (or simply appearing) in the background before stepping forward to take a more active role in the plot.
Amusing Search Terms
sidekick 2 designs: what was wrong with sidekick 1?
pumpkin flames: Burn those pumpkins!
Maria-sama Hard Panda: Again?
manga and anime women in black and white: Colour is the devil’s tool.
how to use rpg maker: such a simple request can lead to great hardship, believe me.
free gay anime parodies: Free? You mean I should start charging?
Last news about hunterxhunter ova 5: I’d wait for OVA4 first.
“anime blog” “captured”: “Bad news, sir, we have been captured by the enemy and forced to blog only boring shows!”
Amusing Spam- now rated R
It is healthy, I shall come on your site more often, thank.”
Reading Azure Flame- now proven beneficial to your health! Throw out those diets and exercise programs!
I guess the thing that upsets me about commercial pet food is that I can”t control what”s in it … exactly.
I notice that Piper gets a really runny nose whenever she Is eating commercial dog food (hiiiigh percentages of corn or wheat), or if I …”
Burt, I completely agree…wait, I don’t even own a dog.
We encourage you to take some added time checking out gay fuck information….”
I had to laugh out loud at this one, especially when they followed up with an advisory to check out dick “information”.
You can expect that personal financial advisors who travel in Sacramento semioccasionally endorse cash loans…”
I have a thing for women with authority. I believe in equality in relationships. A chick who is too passive, who never takes charge of a situation and who waits for me to make all the decisions make…”
You won’t be interested in Belldandy, then.
“Free Anal Porn Videos…
Sorry, it just sounds like a crazy idea for me :)…”
Yeah, I mean come on- free!? People will pay through the nose for this stuff!