Ginga Densetsu Weed parody: episode ten

Weed and the others bring the bodies of John and the expendable dogs back to the camp; Hook has left his post as double agent and come back with them. Reika cries.

Reika: John, I barely knew you, but as REAL MEN can’t be expected to cry, I must weep over you.

Hiro: Let’s go and start randomly digging out graves.

John and the others are buried. The dogs howl for a time, before Hiro turns to Hook.

Hiro: Since you’re just an exposition dog and not a proper fighter, could you take this fang of John’s back to Ohu, so that at least a part of him can rest in peace?

Reika: I’ll go too, since I’m female and therefore of no use in a REAL MEN’s story.

Reika and Hook depart.

Weed: Right, that’s enough of that- onto the next arc. We must recruit Kyoushiro and his followers if we want to fight the final boss, Hougen- assuming he isn’t just a mid-boss.

Meanwhile, Ken and Kagetora have reached their homeland.

Kurotora: Yes, it’s time for lots of cameos from Ginga Nagareboshi Gin characters- if anyone actually bothered to watch that series. Various dogs whose names end in –tora, either go with Ken and my son Kage, or off to Gajou to help protect that place, since right now it’s mainly staffed by nameless brown dogs.

Ben: I’m Ben’s dad, Ken- we have a tradition of imaginative naming to go with our dull brown looks. I’m getting on a bit but thought I’d make a cameo too. Ken, you’ve grown into a fine adult.

Cross: Dear, you’re talking to Kagetora- our son Ken is over there. Since he’s a REAL MAN, he looks exactly like his father and nothing like me.

Ben: Oh dear, my eyes and intellect just aren’t what they used to be.

Back to Weed and the party as they enter Kyoushiro’s territory. They hear the sounds of a young puppy being abused by his father. By the time they reach the unhappy family, however, a scarred white dog has stepped in and ripped the father’s ear off.

Weed: What are you doing?

Scarred-white: Teaching this irresponsible adult a lesson!

Teru-dad: Help me- I may be a bully, but I’m also a coward!

Weed: Scarred-white, this isn’t the way to operate! You must learn the pure hearted way of the main character, the way of forgiveness and solving things through peaceful means.

Scarred-white: Sorry, but I’m not a pure-hearted main character- I’m Kyoushiro, the one-year-old ‘bad boy’ gang leader who became cynical and disillusioned with adults after my dad threw me out. My followers are the same, and whilst we may be young, we’re at least level 30.

GB: You mean this is the guy we came looking for?

Jerome: There must be some good in him, since he appears in the OP.

Kyoushiro’s followers drag Teru-dad away and toss him over a cliff. He lands in a conveniently placed river.

Kyoushiro: From now on, you are subject to a restraining order- come within ten kilometres of your son Teru, and we’ll rip you apart.

Kyoushiro turns to Weed and the others.

Kyoushiro: I don’t care if you’re all main characters or if I’m destined to join you- until the end of the arc, we’re enemies.

Cut to Hougen HQ. A dull brown dog is reporting to Hougen.

Hougen: So, Ohu is led by six-month-old Weed, and Shiga by one-year-old Kyoushiro? As the evilz enemy of them both, I shall send black assassin dogs to finish them off.

Back to Weed and his comrades as they doze. Weed gets up and goes outside.

GB: Shouldn’t we follow him?

Jerome: No need- as the main character, he shall use his 1337 powers of good to win over Kyoushiro.

Meanwhile, in the forest, Teru-dad meets up with the assassin dogs, Lecter and Thunder.

Lecter: Ah, you look discontent- care to help us kill a couple of dogs?

Teru-dad: I may be dull brown-and-white and destined to die soon, but I’m up for it.

Teru-dad deliberately provokes Kyoushiro and his gang into coming after him, but before the trap can be sprung, Weed interrupts.

Weed: Kyoushiro, I know you’re a good person at heart- stop this anti-heroic behaviour!

Kyoushiro: I told you, I can’t adopt your way of thinking this episode!

Weed’s companions arrive and notice the assassin dogs.

Jerome: Hey, what are those suspicious looking dogs doing over there? Do you suppose they’re important to the plot?

Lecter: Damn, we’ve been spotted. Let’s wander off in an obvious fashion.

Kyoushiro: I should probably investigate those strange dogs, but for now, I must concentrate on the plotline at hand.

Weed: In order to show you that violence is wrong, I shall fight you!

Weed vs Kyoushiro- join us next episode for the exciting conclusion!

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One Response to Ginga Densetsu Weed parody: episode ten

  1. Mitch says:

    This parody is damn good!
    Let’s not forget some joke in that horrid anime (the manga is better) when it didn’t include George (Ken’s saluki-mix brother)…

    Ken: Say Mom, if all those various dogs whose names end in –tora are there, then what about my brother who doesn’t look like me?

    Cross: You mean George? Oh! Those writers and animators prefer to rush through the series for money than staying true to the manga and chose to ignore this supporting character in the manga so we tried pretending my two other children are never there.

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