Harukanaru Toki no Naka De parody episode 4


Yasuaki indulges in a flashback to last episode, whilst Akram activates this week’s monster.

Akram: The last few weeks were just a warm-up, but this week the red cherry blossom will surely bring your downfall!

At the castle, Akane is about to attend an important meeting. Fuji insists that she dresses in period clothes.

Akane: But wait- in this sort of series, the heroine is supposed to wear her school uniform no matter what happens!

Her protests are to no avail, and she is soon dressed in a kimono. Tenma and Tomomasa arrive. Tomomasa puts his arms around Akane.

(Tenma: Damn him! When is he going to realise that no one gets to touch my Akane?)

(Tomomasa: Winding Tenma up is so easy, but so much fun. Can’t he see that I’m much bishier than he is, and hence have a larger fanbase?)

(Fuji: Tomomasa, stop flirting with Akane! I want her for HARD YURI.)

Tomomasa: Now that you’ve bothered to get all dressed up for me, I’m going to go and see the Minister of the Left.

Tomomasa, Fuji and Shimon depart, leaving Tenma and Akane alone.

Tenma: Why are you all dressed up like that? Why are you interacting with everyone else? You’re mine, Akane, and don’t you forget it!

Akane: Tenma…

That night, everyone rides out for the Hanashizume festival- the purification of the red cherry blossoms.

Generic monk: These may look like mere flowers, but if the red cherry blossoms fall to the ground, it spells doom for us all!

Yasuaki appears.

Yasuaki: Let’s go, Miko- for even though we never had the benefit of your presence before, you are vital to this ceremony.

Tenma: Come on, Whipping Boy, we can’t let her go off with yet another man.

Generic Monk: I’m sorry, but you’ll have to stay here until something goes wrong and you run off to save Akane.

Akane and Yasuaki walk up the temple steps to reach the red cherry blossom tree.

Akram: Activate monster of the week!

As the generic priests prepare for the purification, a panther appears out of nowhere and attacks them.

Generic Priest: So this is why we didn’t have names!

Upon hearing their cries, Akane runs off by herself. As she stares at their corpses, Akram arrives.

Akram: Yes, it’s me again. I’m not sure why I needed to kill those priests, but now I’ve come to hypnotise you into coming with me. Why I didn’t do this before is anyone’s guess.

Akane is briefly hypnotised, but she breaks free with the aid of a flashback.

Akane: Why are you doing this?

Akram: Akane, trust me, I am far bishier than those pathetic fools you surround yourself with. I am truly all that you need. In due course, we can sit down together and I can talk about myself all day, but for now- activate wind special effect!

The wind starts blowing cherry blossom petals everywhere.

Yorihisa: Oh no, dangerous flower petals! Everyone, mobilise!

Yorihisa, Shimon and Tenma run up the temple steps, but before Tomomasa and his generics can follow, a barrier conveniently appears.

(Tomomasa: Damn, why am I being left out?)

Akram: Ah, it seems I have delayed long enough to allow your friends to come and rescue you.

Tenma runs towards Akram and Akane.

Tenma: Akane! Don’t you dare touch another man! Jealousy Blast!

Tenma somehow gains the ability to fire a blue energy blast from his hand. Yorihisa uses the opportunity to snatch Akane away from Akram.

Akram: Convenient Teleportation Ability!

Akram teleports on top of the temple roof, before transferring himself to Yasuaki’s location. Somehow, he gains a katana on the way, which he uses to attack Yasuaki. Yasuaki easily blocks with his beads.

Yasuaki: Mere swords are no match for my beads!

Yasuaki knocks Akram’s katana away, but it flies up and cuts off a cherry blossom branch. As the petals reach the ground, the tree starts shifting ominously, and more petals fall, just as Akane and the others run over.

Akram: Gwakaka, you’re too late to do anything! I can’t be defeated for at least two minutes!

The falling petals transform into miniature demons. They bypass the main characters and start attacking generics. Tenma, Tomomasa and Yorihisa start slashing ineffectually at them.

Akram: I’ll just stand here and watch, as per usual.

(Tenma: Hmm, maybe if I actually attacked Akram, it would move the plot forward.)

Tenma tries to attack Akram, but he uses Convenient Teleport to avoid the blow.

(Tenma: Damn, I need to fire another Jealousy Blast, but when he’s not touching Akane, I just can’t summon it.)

Akram: You’re all useless and pathetic- not at all like me, who just stands here and does nothing!

Yorihisa rushes in to attack Akram, but is easily disabled.

Akane: You… how can you hurt others? You know what I think- I think you’re not a good person!

Akram shrugs.

Akram: I am the main villain, you know.

Akane: We’re Running Out of Time Magical Plot Device!

A burst of light emanates from Akane- the demons are banished, cherries blossoms purified, generic revive, and a small piece of Akram’s mask is chipped away before he vanishes. Akane picks up the mask fragment.

(Akane: He must be truly bishie without his mask.)

To be continued…

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