Harukanaru Toki no Naka De parody episode 7

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Fuji explains the monster of the week.

Fuji: Hello, everyone. This week we are being menaced by a vengeful spirit with white wings and long hair.

Shimon: Why are vengeful spirits so angry? Can’t we all just live in peace?

Tenma: Cut the idealism, Whipping Boy- the only peace worth having is the one you make with your fists.

(Yorihisa: White wings, long hair, that description sounds vague enough that I immediately recognise it as someone connected to my past.)

Yorihisa enters Flashback Mode, to a time when he was a little boy living with his brother (HARD GAY.)

Brother: The Nue is a beast that lives out in the forest. They say he is a beast in the bedroom, but Yorihisa, you must only be HARD GAY with me.

The next day, Yorihisa goes straight into the forest. He meets a man with long white hair.

Nue: This is the HARD GAY forest of the Nue. What could a child like you want here?

Yorihisa: I’m looking for the Nue.

(Nue: This boy must be really stupid if he doesn’t realise that I am the Nue. I mean, just look at my non-generic character design!)

The Nue hits Yorihisa.

Nue: You are not HARD GAY enough for me, boy. Come back when you are older and more experienced.

Yorihisa: What, you mean to say that you are the Nue? I wouldn’t have realised if you hadn’t mentioned it.

Yorihisa goes home, but for many days after that, he returns to the forest and gets beaten by the Nue.

Flash forward to an era when Yorihisa is a young man with a Naoji-like haircut and a brand new ‘sword’. Day after day, he continues to challenge the Nue, but is never quite HARD GAY enough.

Nue: Why do you keep coming here? It’s a pain for me to have to deal with such an unskilled man day after day.

Yorihisa: I was raised in a house of warriors- is it no wonder that I want to refine my HARD GAY skills?

Nue: I am sorry, but even though I am the last of my kind, I must maintain my standards. I cannot allow just anyone into the bedroom.

Yorihisa: Last of your kind? What do you mean?

(Nue: Is he really this stupid, or just trying to wind me up?)

Nue: I mean that I’m the only one left…in this forest, anyway. It has never occurred to me to go to other forests and see if Nue exist there.

(Yorihisa: The last one…he must be lonely. I will hone my skills and become a worthy HARD GAY partner for him.)

Unfortunately, although Yorihisa trains hard, before he can enjoy HARD GAY with the Nue, he moves to the capital with his brother and father.

Back in the present…

Tenma: Snap out of Flashback Mode, Yorihisa, it’s time to get on with the story.

Yorihisa, Tenma, Shimon and Akane go out to Daimonji Mountain. Once they get there, a strange wind starts blowing leaves around. Yorihisa grips his katana.

Yorihisa: No evil leaf shall threaten the Miko!

The Nue appears from nowhere.

Yorihisa: Nue! After spending all that time on a flashback about you, I never dreamed it would relate to the present situation!

Whilst Tenma and Yorihisa stand around, the Nue kidnaps Akane.

Nue: So, you are into women now, are you, Yorihisa? If that is the case, come alone to the summit of the mountain and fetch her. I will wait there like an obedient minor boss.

The Nue flies off. Yorihisa prepares to follow on foot.

Tenma: Wait a minute- you can’t think to go alone when my Akane is in danger!

Yorihisa: Just leave it to m, Tenma, for I have a bigger fanbase.

(Yorihisa:…and perhaps I can partake of some HARD GAY.)

Through the magic of flashback, we see how the Nue came to be controlled by a mysterious man in a hooded cape whom the astute will recognise as Akram.

Akram: Nue, you are going to be this episode’s monster of the week.

Nue: Why should I serve someone like you? I have my own agenda.

Akram: Then let me use this mind control needle. Of course, I could just use it on Akane herself, but where would be the fun be in that?

In the present, the Nue sits with Akane.

Nue: Stay away from me- I am not interested in women. I must just hold my sanity together long enough to enjoy HARD GAY with Yorihisa.

Yorihisa starts walking up the mountain until he encounters the Nue in a mutated beast form.

Nue: See what I have become, Yorihisa! This is the most bestial form of HARD GAY! If you cannot withstand it, you will die- and then I will kill the girl for some unexplained reason!

Yorihisa uses his ‘sword’ to attack the Nue. When it proves to be insufficient, he must summon a greater power.

Yorihisa: Nonsensical Plot Powers, give me a Wind Slash!

Yorihisa creates a wind attack that hits the Nue and causes him to revert to human form.

Nue: Yorihisa, I am sorry. The demons turned me into an uncontrollable beast, ruled by my passions without my usual cool elegance in the bedroom. You must end it all by stabbing me one more time with your ‘sword’.

Yorihisa: Nue…

Nue: You must do it, Yorihisa. Put HARD GAY behind you and concentrate on the woman.

Yorihisa uses Flashback Mode to angst over his inevitable decision, before the Nue forces his hand by attacking. Yorihisa ends it by stabbing his ‘sword’ into him.

Meanwhile, an oblivious Akane pets the Nue’s deer until Yorihisa comes to collect her.

Yorihisa: Okay, Miko-dono, it’s time to go home.

Akane: That man, was he your…?

Yorihisa: He was my lover for a brief moment, but now I am completely devoted to you, Miko-dono.

To mark the importance of Yorihisa’s emotions, a special ED starts as he hugs Akane.

To be continued…

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One Response to Harukanaru Toki no Naka De parody episode 7

  1. Hazel says:

    **LOL** “This is the HARD GAY forest of the Nue”…you took the words out of my mind.

    I’m actually really enjoying this series, was just having a look to see if anyone had written about it and found your parodies, made me giggle so thanks! 🙂

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