Chevalier Alternative 22 part I

With Teillagory gone, everyone’s choice of partners is reduced, and that means it is time to take drastic measures. Whilst d’Eon convinces Robin to convert to BI, Louis is forced to resort to his emergency choice- Broglie. Meanwhile, Marie is making a nice bundle from her cosmetic surgery business, but will it all backfire for her and her customers?

Robin and d’Orleans experience the aftermath of a HARD GAY encounter.

“You beast! It’s people like you that give HARD GAY a bad name!”

“Is that what happens when you try to deny your HARD GAY emotions?”

“I want no part of this type of brutal HARD GAY.”

“Wait, I still need someone to have BI with!”

Teillagory is spent and exhausted after receiving Robin’s Pistol.

“It’s no good, I’m just going to have to give myself Sword.”

“Ah yes, that hit the spot.”

“D’Eon, I know you’re BI now, but could you grant me one last request? I’d like to die in the throes of HARD GAY.”

“I don’t really like doing it the old fashioned way, but I guess it’s okay just this once.”

d’Eon and Teillagory commence their last ever HARD GAY encounter.

“Oh yes, that feels good!”

Teillagory reaches out to grab his ‘sword’.

(“I feel quite sorry for the old man, unable to even have proper HARD GAY.”)

(“Oh well, may as well give him some Sword.”)

“Here you go, old boy.”

“Feels good, doesn’t it?”

“Ah, a bloodied ‘sword’, just what I like to see.”

“That was good HARD GAY, d’Eon- now I can rest in peace.”

Just like his life, Teillagory’s death was all about HARD GAY.

“He just can’t be dead! I refuse to believe it!”

“Here, let me have HARD GAY with him! I’ll prove he’s still alive!”

“Foolish boy- you would only be having CORPSE.”

“This is the inevitable end for those who cling foolishly to the old traditions of pure HARD GAY. The true future lies with BI.”


(“Could BI be the answer I have been looking for?”)

(“It was right under my nose all this time and I never gave it a second thought!”)

(“If only I had realised the value of BI sooner!”)

“Come on, let’s find a bedroom so I can start teaching you about BI as soon as possible.”

“Damn, I forgot all about the time! I must make it home before Countdown begins!”

“Oh wait, is that the clock striking?”

“Damn, I missed it.”

“Excuse me, but are any of you recording Countdown?”

“You’re not? Damn.”

“Well in that case, would you mind giving me some HARD GAY?”


“Here, I’ll unzip my trousers- once you see my Zhuge Liang I’m sure you’ll change your mind.”

“Oh come on, I’m really desperate here.”

“In that case, I’m sure you won’t mind having HARD GAY with me.”

“You? You can’t be serious- I’ve seen your Liang and it’s nothing to write home about.”

“Then let me put it another way- it’s me or celibacy.”

“What!? No, this can’t be happening!”

“Oh, all right then- but get it over with quickly.”

“I’m going to enjoy this.”

“Rozen Maidens, help me!”

“Damn you, skull controller- why can’t I even beat Minesweeper on Easy?”

Beware the hand.

Do not attempt to adjust your monitor.

“With this skull controller, Minesweeper will never be a challenge to me again!”

The headquarters of Marie’s cosmetic surgery venture will one day become the offices of New Wang.

“Excuse me, I have a follow-up appointment about my operation.”

“Ah, Saint-Germain, I’ve been expecting you.”

“Rest assured that my organisation will do everything in its power to keep you at your most attractive.”

“Right, let’s begin the Psalmotherapy session.”

“First, I’ll gather the required healing energy.”

“Yes! I need never fear wrinkles or old age again!”

“Unghh…I don’t remember it being this painful before!”

“What are you doing to me, woman!?”

“That cheque you gave me for the operation bounced. Think of this as your punishment.”

“NOOOO!!!! You weren’t supposed to cash it until Monday!”

“Ah, what do we have here- another potential customer? I have to warn you that we’re only taking payment in cash from now on.”

“Don’t go under the knife, Robespierre- it’s not worth it!”

“You fool, I am too bishie to need cosmetic surgery.”

“I’m actually here because of my part-time job as a travelling salesman- tell me, would you be interested in purchasing this exquisite blood-stained handkerchief?”

“Door to door salesmen are so annoying- just hang on a minute whilst I finish up here.”

“Let this be a lesson to anyone who thinks they can get away without paying what they owe.”

Robespierre’s latent HARD GAY field is so intense that it can even crack the Wangs of Versailles.

“So anyway, about this handkerchief- I hope you realise I’m not the sort to go easy on salesmen.”

“If Madam will just take a closer look at the product, I’m sure she’ll find it to her liking.”

“Well, to be honest, it doesn’t look all that special to me; couldn’t you at least have shown me a clean one?”

“Please, you really have to buy this- if I don’t make my quota, I might get fired!”

“Hmm, well I guess I could find some use for it.”

d’Eon checks his condition in the aftermath of his intense HARD GAY with Teillagory.

“Okay, Robin, if you want to start learning about BI, this book is the key.”

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2 Responses to Chevalier Alternative 22 part I

  1. ifern says:

    Excellent as always.

    “You fool, I am too bishie to need cosmetic surgery.”

  2. Dominique says:

    “Foolish boy- you would only be having CORPSE.”

    lulz, that’s even better than BOOK

Comments are closed.