Shounen Onmyouji parody episode 16

Takaoka no Kami possesses Masahiro again.

Mokkun: What are you here for? You’d better have plot information, otherwise it’s just a waste of screen time.

Takaoka no Kami: Actually, I do have something to say- something is going to happen to soon.

Takaoka no Kami departs.

Mokkun: Yeah, like we couldn’t have figured that out on our own.

Later, Masahiro and Mokkun go out on patrol.

Masahiro: Something’s going to happen? This sounds like important information.

A ghost randomly appears in front of them.

Masahiro: Oh, looks like we’ve triggered a cut scene- let’s follow it.

Meanwhile, Rikugou investigates another cut scene and sees Kazane reporting in to a two-headed black crow.

Crow: Gwakaka, did you think you were the villain of this arc? You are too good looking to be truly evil, and so you are merely a deputy of me, a two-headed crow!

Kazane: Yes, Lord.

Crow: You have lost to the heroes as expected! I must now idly threaten you in the hopes that you will come up with another pointless and convoluted plan to fail to kill Seimei!

Kazane: Couldn’t I just stab him and be done with it?

Crow: Silence!

(Rikugou: That villain…he must be a previously unmentioned person of plot importance.)

Masahiro and Mokkun follow the ghost, only to encounter a Fusion Slime Demon.

Masahiro: Great- this could give me the EXP I need to reach Level Six!

Unfortunately, before Masahiro can do anything, Toshitsugu attacks the Fusion Slime Demon.

Toshitsugu: Lightning Zap!

Slime Demon: Slimy Tentacles!

Masahiro: Guess he’s not as high level as he claims- let’s join his party.

Mokkun: Nonsense- if he recognises you, he’ll know what an embarrassingly low level you are.

Rikugou conveniently appears.

Masahiro: I’ll just borrow Rikugou’s cloak and wrap it around myself- it’s not as good as a tiny mask, but it will help to disguise me.

Masahiro covers himself up with Rikugou’s cloak and joins the battle.

Masahiro: Energy Bomb!

Toshitsugu: Who is that? I don’t recognise either his build or his voice.

Guren and Rikugou also join the battle. They immediately occupy the front row in order to keep Masahiro from sustaining damage and defeat the monster.

Masahiro: Yay, I’m Level Six!

Toshitsugu: Level Six? I’m going to defeat you and get lots of EXP!

Toshitsugu attacks Masahiro with a spell, rendering him unconscious. Guren and Rikugou remove him from the battlefield and take him home to Seimei.

Seimei: Looks like his HP dropped to zero- he needs an overnight stay at an inn to replenish his health.

Rikugou: By the way, I have some plot information- the real boss of this arc is Ryusai.

Seimei: Hmm, an enemy with whom I have a previously unmentioned past- I sense unlimited potential for flashbacks.

The next day, Masahiro wakes up from a strange dream, only for Akiko to tell him that the generic ghost is still with him.

Seimei: Well, it looks like you’ve been possessed by a generic ghost desperate for screen time.

Masahiro: I must get rid of it!

Masahiro tries to get up, only to collapse.

Seimei: Oops, looks like the ghost has cast Stamina Drain on you again. With your low HP, you’ll need to rest often. It’s even possible that this generic will take over your body and become the main character.

Masahiro: I am so not letting that happen.

Later, Masahiro talks to Mokkun.

Masahiro: If I find out more about this ghost, maybe I can help them.

Mokkun: He’s a generic- there’s nothing to find out!

Masahiro feels weak again.

Masahiro: Damn this Stamina Drain- have you got any Potions?

Later, Masahiro goes out to fight Fusion Slime Demons in an attempt to reach the elusive Level Seven. Kazane is also out, and she runs into Masahiro.

Kazane: Is that Abe no Masahiro? But I killed you ten years ago!

Masahiro: Hmm, first I’ve heard of it.

Mokkun: Actually, I saved your life back then. Let’s have a quick Flashback Mode to establish that fact.

We once again see Guren saving young Masahiro.

Kazane: All I had do was kill you back then, and then I could have been the main character! Now die in the name of the unborn series Shoujo Onmyouji! Wind Cutters!

Kazane knocks down Masahiro and Mokkun and slowly prepares to kill Masahiro.

Mokkun: The main character can’t die in episode sixteen! Flame Blast!

Kazane is knocked back as Toshitsugu randomly arrives.

Toshitsugu: What’s going on? Are you secretly levelling up, Masahiro?

Masahiro: Uh, no.

Masahiro and Mokkun go home.

Seimei: Masahiro, go to bed- I want HARD GAY with Touda.

To be continued…

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