Shounen Onmyouji parody episode 21

Masahiro is wandering around alone in the underworld.

Masahiro: Where is everybody!? I’m only Level Seven- I can’t be expected to fight alone!

Masahiro uses a locator spell to find Genbu, Rikugou and Taiin. Over in the distance they see Nagako.

Taiin: She’s the one who created the curse- we should defeat her and see what happens.

Masahiro: Like I’m going to get any EXP from fighting a little girl- it’s best if I talk to her instead.

Masahiro approaches Nagako.

Nagako: Go away! No one loves me! I’m in despair!

Masahiro: Genbu, could you use your magic CCTV to show Nagako her mother?

Genbu does so.

Empress: Nagako, just in case you are somehow watching me right now, I want you to know that I love you.

Nagako: Mummy loves me! I want to see her now! I’m in despair!

In order to break the cloying sentimentality, a monster appears.

Rikugou: This is more like it- Equip Spear!

Taiin: Wind Slicer!

Taiin removes the creature’s arm and second head, but it regenerates.

Genbu: Barrier!

Masahiro: It’s no good- we need Mokkun in the party in order to defeat this.

The party continues to attack, but the creature regenerates after every successful blow. In desperation, Masahiro moves to the front row.

Masahiro: Plot powers, protect me!

Guren: Deus ex Flames!

Guren arrives just in time to toast the monster with his flames.

Masahiro: Guren, thank god you’ve arrived! Everything will be fine now that you’re standing here motionless with your seal ring removed- I mean, obviously nothing bad is going to-

Guren thrusts his hand through Masahiro’s torso. Masahiro falls to the ground in slow motion, before bleeding unrealistically over the floor.

Guren: Hmmph, Level Seven- hardly worth my time.

Guren tosses Masahiro over to the other three Shinshou.

Genbu: Healing!

Taiin: Masahiro, don’t die! Use your main character powers to recover somehow!

Kazane appears from nowhere.

Kazane: Mwahaha, he shall not recover, for I must become the main character!

Guren: All right, that’s enough talking- Flame Attack!

Rikugou: Defend!

Rikugou uses his cloak to defend against Guren’s flame attacks. Meanwhile, Nagako runs to Kazane.

Kazane: Nagako, all I wanted was for you to have the peaceful childhood I never did- that’s why I put you in danger and brought you to the underworld.

As Guren continues to attack, Suzaku, Tenitsu and bishie-Seimei arrive.

Seimei: Ah, I see you’ve injured Masahiro- perhaps it’s time for me to take over as main character.

Tenitsu: Masahiro is injured!? I’d better heal him!

(Seimei: Damn, stop helping the boy!)

Guren: I shall be the main character! Flames of Hell!

As Guren overpowers Seimei, the two-headed crow arrives.

Crow: Gwakaka, what do you think of my brand new form, Seimei?

Seimei: You may have tried to cunningly disguise yourself as my old friend, but I can see that you’re just a two-headed crow!

Crow: Hmm, you’re cleverer than you look, but no matter- I shall still reign supreme when I unleash the powers of the underworld! Guren, kill them all!

Guren: White Dragon!

To be continued…

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