Tuesday Rumble: July 8th

Allison and Lillia’s handbook for life

Do you have difficulty in social situations? Do you just not know what to do when put on the spot? Luckily, Allison and Wil have put together a convenient handbook that will sit snugly on your bookshelf right next to “How to Win Friends and Influence People”.

  • When old men tell tall tales, don’t hesitate to believe them. Who knows, their wild stories of war-ending treasures might just be true, and if not, at least you got a nice cup of tea for your efforts.
  • When suspicious old ladies offer you a cup of tea, drink it without reservation. Even if she locks you in her cellar, it shouldn’t be too hard to get out.
  • When dictators attack, don’t leave it to the highly trained security guards. Remember, he’ll invariably flee for the roof of the nearest building, and then you can just blow him off with the wake from your plane.
  • When mysterious majors order you to attack military trains and tanks, just go along without question. Remember, tanks are super-fast vehicles with a low rate of fire, whilst armoured trains are no match for a standard service revolver.

Sayonara Zetsubou Sensei: the lost chapters

Sensei takes his class to the canteen.

Chiri: Sensei, why are we here? It’s not lunchtime yet!

Sensei: Class, today we’re having a special lesson on how to eat difficult foods! We’ll start with spaghetti.

Sensei tries to eat some spaghetti, but it goes wrong.

Kafka: Don’t worry, Sensei- if you can’t twirl it, just cut it up.

Sensei: But that’s not acceptable in polite company! Zetsubou shita! These hard to eat foods have left me in despair!

  • Precariously arranged restaurant dishes where you don’t know where to start.
  • Meat that can’t be cut because the knife is too blunt.
  • Unsliced bread that requires a steady hand to make a perfect slice.
  • Cream puffs that leak out as you bite into them.
  • Seafood and shellfish that defies access.
  • Working inwards with the cutlery, only to realise it’s been mixed up to catch you out.
  • Trying to spoon food on your plate and getting one bean at a time.

Shion no Ou 21

“I don’t have time for Pleasure right now!”

“…when we will have a Pleasure extravaganza!”

“I’m just going to have Hyper Self Pleasure tonight.”

“I don’t want them to catch me at it.”

“If I decide to have full Pleasure, I’ll let you know.”

“I think he did it because he was a transvestite, but everyone’s entitled to their own opinion.”

“I admit it- I practised with Hyper Self Pleasure!”

Kurenai 12

Yayoi contemplates trying a new HARD YURI technique.

“Eh? You want to get adventurous?”

“I may not be able to control it.”

“Don’t worry, I’m ready.”

“Then let me show you the heights of Pleasure!”

This Week in Anime

Thanks to loli_slayer for sending in the last two images.

Zetsubou shita! These notes have left me in despair!

Zetsubou shita! Marco’s face has left me in despair!

But which is better- small orange fruit or large green fruit? There’s only one way to find out….FIGHT!

It seems that small orange fruit has won, against all the odds.

Wide angle shots return!

From now on, Tuesday Rumble will be spotting rubber ducks as well.

World’s most athletic fat cat spotted.

“Ballroom, latin or freestyle?”

“…a Zhuge Liang?”

It was love at first sight…

…but would their relationship last?

Classic PC Games: Raptor- Call of the Shadows

Take on the role of a mercenary and battle against the forces of an evil organisation in this top scrolling shooter from 1995. With nine levels in the shareware version and additional regions to unlock in the full version, Raptor throws wave upon wave of enemies at you, from the straightforward to the fiendishly complicated. Fortunately, the more money you earn, the more you can upgrade your ship with shields and killer weapons- and if you can’t get enough first time around, then you’ll be sent back to the beginning with your bank balance intact to start saving up for the next purchase. Overall, it’s good fun, and even though it can get repetitive whilst trying to save up, it also proves addictive in brief bursts.

Harem of the week: Hino Kahoko (La Corda d’Oro)

With her magical violin, she set out to win a music competition despite having no previous experience, but along the way she would meet her fair share of musically inclined bishounen.

Harem

Tsuchiura: A good friend from the ‘normal’ section of the school, he gave up the piano and focused on soccer until the plot dictated otherwise.

Tsukimori: The cold-hearted overachiever who also studies the violin- can Kahoko melt him even a little?

Yunoki: The most popular bishounen in the school- talented, relaxed and universally adored.

Hihara: The easygoing senpai who’s a little rough around the edges.

Shimizu: The sleepy and often detached blonde-haired ‘shota’.