Ginga Densetsu Weed parody: episode eight

The battle begins.

Jerome: I won’t let you lay a finger on Weed!

Rocket: We’re dogs, we don’t have fingers. Brothers, Triple Attack!

Missile and Jet attack from the right and left, injuring Jerome. Rocket goes for a frontal attack, but Jerome is ready for him.

Rocket: Old man, you may have switched to defence mode but you still took damage!

Jerome: Ah, but Rocket, I wasn’t in defence mode! Now you shall suddenly spurt blood and realise that you were injured!

Rocket and the others do just that.

Rocket: Start round 2! Triple Attack!

Jerome evades the second triple attack.

Jerome: I’ve levelled up now- that attack won’t work anymore.

Rocket: Jet, Missile, switch to Delta Attack!

The three brothers try a Delta Attack but the forces of Good prevail and they are owned. Weed’s other comrades conveniently show up just as the battle ends.

Jerome: Now, let’s finish this.

Weed: No, Jerome, for I am good and pure hearted, and besides, the death count is already quite high on this series. We must let them go.

Weed and the others carry on, leaving Rocket and his brothers behind.

Missile: Come on, brother, let’s get back to Hougen.

Rocket: I’m sorry, but I have seen the light and have finally decided (after two episodes) to join the side of good. Farewell, brothers, your designs are too generic for you to join me or be of any importance.

Meanwhile, at Hougen HQ, Hook finally has some use other than exposition when he brings snow to John and Gin (their latent God Mode helped them survive last episode).

Hook: Don’t worry, Leader, plotlines that will involve your rescue are already in place.

Outside, Hougen and his minions are harassing Reika, who runs off.

Hougen: After her- there’s an abnormally low number of females in this series, so if she escapes, no one will be getting any!

The minions chase after her, but Hiro conveniently appears and performs his trademark move.

Hiro: Unless we have some revelations later on, I don’t know this girl, but I’m ready to save her from scum like you. Shame you don’t have any balls, Hougen, or I’d rip them off.

Hougen: Very funny, but I’m an EVILZ villain with no sense of humour. Capture him!

Hougen orders his minions forward, and Hiro is overpowered.

Whilst Weed and the others continue on their way with Rocket trailing behind, Missile and Jet report back to Hougen.

Hougen: Missile, Jet, I had nameless dogs spying on you and so I already knew that your brother defected- and if one brother is tainted, all must be. Now you’ll learn what happens to those who betray me!

Missile: Uh, for one thing, we didn’t actually betray you, and for another, we can’t really learn anything if we’re dead.

Hougen: Shut up! I hate it when people talk back to me, mainly because I’m useless at thinking up good comebacks. Minions, kill them!

The minions set upon Missile and Jet (death count +2). Whilst the main forces of EVILZ are otherwise occupied, three random dogs visit Gin, Hiro and John.

Random dog #1: Don’t worry, Leader, we’re working with Hook- he recruited us off-screen.

Hook arrives.

Hook: We have to hurry- whilst the minions are killing Missile and Jet, we can rescue Reika and escape.

John: Nonsense, there’s plenty of time for us to have a discussion before taking action.

Hiro: Count me out, I’m the typical grizzled loner.

Gin: I didn’t mention this before, but my tendons have been damaged and I can’t actually walk. John, you go with Hook and rescue Reika.

Hiro: Come to think of it, Reika was the girl I tried to rescue earlier. Forget what I just said, I’ve decided to go with you.

Everyone except Gin leaves. Cut to Weed and the group.

Rocket: You know, you’ll really need more dogs to fight Hougin- and that means you’ll need to take a time consuming trip over to the other side of the Alps to recruit random nameless dogs who dislike Hougin.

Ken: Come to think of it, Kagetora and I know yet more dogs that we could recruit- see you later, everyone.

Rocket: I’ll lead the way to these other dogs.

Jerome: I don’t think so. I still doubt you, so I’ll lead the way.

The dogs struggle on through a snowstorm, with never a hint of an alpine ski resort. As they climb a hill, GB is blown away.

Weed: GB!

Rocket: Leave him, he’s a useless sidekick.

Weed: You should know by now that I’d never leave anyone behind!

Weed is blown away whilst attempting to retrieve GB. Luckily a conveniently placed tree breaks their fall, although their hold is tenuous. Just as they are about to let go, however, Rocket rescues them and somehow flings them onto a ledge. Now Rocket is stuck clinging to the tree, but fortunately Jerome arrives to rescue him.

Jerome: I guess you’re not that bad a guy after all, Rocket.

Rocket: I knew risking my life for Weed would make you respect me.

Jerome: My opinion of you has completely changed, so I’m happy for you to lead us to these other nameless dogs.

Rocket: Let’s go.

Some other stuff happened towards the end but I don’t think it was important.

This entry was posted in Ginga Densetsu Weed and tagged . Bookmark the permalink.