Romance of the Three Kingdoms 35

Love is in air, but with it comes the unpleasant taint of jealousy, for whilst Liu Bei has found happiness in the arms of Zhuge Liang, Guan Yu and Zhang Fei have been left out in the cold. Will they accept that this is the way of things now, or can they persuade Liu Bei to make some time for them as well?

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The light of God shines down on the happy couple.

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Liu Bei treats his new lover well, with scant regard for his former partners.

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Guan Ping taunts Zhang Fei with the unavoidable fact that he is no longer welcome in his master’s bed.

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Zhang Fei is annoyed at having been jilted.

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Liu Biao sends a messenger to request HARD GAY from Liu Bei.

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Zhuge Liang is not about to let his lover out of his sight, and thus proposes a threesome.

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“Aargh, I’m dying, dying!”
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If Liu Bei says something, it must be correct.

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Heaven forbid that the Righteous Liu Bei should ever do the wrong thing.

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Zhuge Liang realises that Liu Bei cannot be tempted to sample the darker side of HARD GAY.

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To all commenters who doubted the HARD GAY nature of this series, I present to you the following unedited screencap.

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The situation is bad, but not dire enough to warrant a full “Damn”.

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Dang it…dang it all to heck.

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Liu Bei is annoyed when Guan Yu and Zhang Fei try to entice him into some HARD GAY.

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Zhang Fei cannot keep his jealousy in check any longer.

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He points out that all the officers are feeling deprived of HARD GAY with their master.

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“One day, you will understand that a minute of HARD GAY with Zhuge Liang is worth a lifetime of HARD GAY with any of you.”

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“You cannot hope to understand us!”

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“This is true love!”

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Xiahou Dun and his lovers arrive.

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“Gwakaka, I cannot possibly be defeated!”

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Liu Bei explains that the enemy has assembled an impressive amount of HARD GAY.

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“What’s this? Have you come crawling back to us just because Xiahou Dun has so much more HARD GAY than you?”

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“Why can’t you just understand the love that Zhuge and I share?”

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“Ten thousand men cannot even begin to match my HARD GAY.”

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When Liu Bei proposes group HARD GAY to placate his officers, Zhuge Liang insists that he should be the one in charge.

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Liu Bei demonstrates his superior wisdom.

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In exchange for his advice, Zhuge Liang asks Liu Bei for his unwavering commitment to their HARD GAY.

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Liu Bei explains that only Zhuge Liang’s HARD GAY is enough to even the odds.

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Zhang Fei is unimpressed when Zhuge says he will take a safe position in the rear.

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“Defy me, and I will kill you with the intensity of my HARD GAY.”

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This time, a full “damn you” is needed.

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“You wouldn’t dare do anything to me as long I hold the master’s ‘sword’ in my hands!”

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Guan Yu realises the danger and cautions Zhang Fei to hold back for now.

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He suggests that they just try the group HARD GAY for now.

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The battle commences.

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Xiahou Dun is amused by rumours that Liu Bei’s ‘sword’ is only a short affair.

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Xiahou Dun invites Zhao Yun over for some HARD GAY.

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Zhang Fei decides that he should take Xiahou Dun, however.

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The group HARD GAY is such a success that Guan Yu and Zhang Fei become instant converts to the cult of Zhuge Liang.

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Zhuge Liang admits that a portion of the success was due to the strength of Zhang Fei and Guan Yu’s HARD GAY. Good job.

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Seizing your opponent’s ‘sword’ is a worthy HARD GAY tactic. Good job.