Tuesday Rumble: October 24th

Sometimes the path of obtaining good artwork is one strewn with pain and sacrifice. For example, I dislike looking at H-scenes, but nonetheless when bj0rn uploaded the Yoake CG set, I decided to acquire it anyway, in the hopes of finding some good pictures that didn’t involve sex scenes. Luckily, amongst the 500+ pictures there were around 279 that didn’t involve Tatsuya partaking of whichever girl happened to be in the immediate vicinity, but in order to single them out, I had to sit through numerous pictures of him sleeping with underage girls and even his own family members.

Bartender Re-imagined
He tends the bar! He mixes the drinks! He serves the customers! He is….the Bartender!

For those of you who wanted to see a more action-orientated version of Bartender we are proud to present Bartender: Shounen Mix. Join our spiky-haired hero as he aims to follow in his grandfather’s footsteps and become the legendary bartender with the Glass of God. Friends and rivals will never be far away as he puts all his skills into mixing the perfect drink and claiming victory in the bartending arena- but will hours of training under the world’s strongest bartenders be enough to defeat his ultimate rival, a rich semi-bishie trained from birth in bartending techniques?

The Future of the Mai- franchise Part Two: Mai-Nekotome

Last week, Mai-Musume was covered, but now it’s time to outline another possible future Mai series- Mai Nekotome. In case you can’t guess from the title, Mai-Nekotome is all about cats, specifically, the fat grey ones of Mai-Otome. Find out more about the special powers of Mikoto, Jubei, moon-Mikoto, Z-Mikoto and the other Nekotome as they serve their Shinso-sama (human Mikoto). If you thought humans were in charge in the world of Mai-Otome, think again, because behind the scenes, these obese felines are keeping everything running smoothly.

Mini-Parody: Hataraki Man 1
Lead: I am hardworking, but is that really enough? I must angst and long for a REAL MAN, for my boyfriend is never around.

Minister: Gwakaka, I am a politician and thus corrupt and evilz! I am also fat!

Lead: I will expose your evilz with the power of Justice!

Lead writes an exposé article for her newspaper, but it backfires when a secretary is blamed.

Lead: Oh noes, all my hard work has backfired! I must sink deeper into angst, especially as I have no REAL MAN to rely on!

Chief: Lead, just write what is in your heart and everything will turn out okay.

Lead: Thank you, Chief…I equip Pen of Destiny! Now everything I write will turn to gold!

Narita: By the way, did I mention I’m not interested in women? Yes, even this series has HARD GAY.

Busou Renkin episode 2 parody

Kazuki likes his wang so much that he even wants to give it a name.

Like most men, he has an inflated opinion of its size and importance.

Tokiko brings him back down to earth with the cold hard truth about his ‘lance’.

Kazuki’s friend worries that their HARD GAY relationship is threatened by Tokiko.

Nonetheless, Kazuki’s sister cannot believe that he would forsake HARD GAY in order to spend time with a woman.

Friend is still convinced that he has been dumped in favour of Tokiko.

Weekly Awards

Neoromance series of the Week: With Haruka 8 being a painful procession of angst and Angelique proving to have no discernible storyline whatsoever, there is an easy win for La Corda d’Oro in this category. With an actual plot and a female who seems able to do more than just ‘Cheer’, Corda d’Oro has a significant head start on the competition.

Cheesy J-Pop theme of the Week: It wouldn’t be right not to mention Hikaru no Go at least once a week, and this time it scoops the prize for this category with its first OP, “Get Over”. I’m also developing an appreciation for the second and third OPs, “I’ll be the One” and “Fantasy”.

Commiseration Prize for Worst Masked Man: Some time ago, awards were given out to the top masked men of anime, but now the time has come to hand out a consolation prize to the man who had to don the only mask left in the wardrobe. Yes, it’s the leotard-wearing butterly-mask villain from Busou Renkin, a man who wanted to be HARD GAY but took it to terrifying new places.

Manga that could go on Forever: With Furuba supposedly coming to an end this year and thus out of the race, the remaining contenders are left to battle it out amongst themselves. Ignoring the SJ series which I largely don’t read anymore, the prize must be shared between Tsubasa, xxxHOLiC, School Rumble and NHK.

OST Spotlight: .hack//games perfect collection
Unfortunately, the US release of the .hack game OSTs is a ‘digest’ version, so for completists, only the Japanese version will do. What this does mean is that you get every possible remix imaginable, and even an entire bonus CD of the in-game sound effects (entirely negligible unless you have a hankering to listen to a grunty belching). Nonetheless, based on the actual musical content, this is one of the better game soundtracks out there; it may be filler, but it’s also filler done so well that it actually becomes very good.

Since .hack strays away from the classic RPG style, it isn’t as constrained to the usual required set of themes as the other game soundtracks mentioned here. Instead, the synth-heavy tracks take on a more mystical and ethereal feel (except for a few weaker ‘cheerful marching’ style tracks) that naturally evolve across the CD from the root town themes, through field and dungeon to boss battles and dramatic cut scenes. With the soundtrack arranged in such a progression, however, everything blends together into an atmospheric whole, so it’s hard to point to a handful of single tracks as standing above the rest.

The side effect of this is that there are sections where you’ll find yourself listening to more, and more, and more of the same, such as the Eight Phases, eight consecutive remixes of the same theme. The more you listen, however, the more you’ll become attuned to the subtle differences between each remix, making the weaker sections less of a slog.

Notable tracks: Delta Server Mac Anu, Loop 1-4, Aura’s Theme

Worthiness: An atmospheric collection that is worthy even if you didn’t think much of the .hack games.

In Your Reflection
Today we explore an entire family of anime relations as we look at Haseo’s family tree. The son of Tsume (Wolf’s Rain), Haseo was a promiscuous man who fathered no fewer than three children (that we know of) with different mothers. His relationship with KOS-MOS led to the birth of T’elos, his time with Tabby conceived Hideo, and his illicit affair with a grunty created Haseo Grunty.

tsume.gif -> haseodesign.jpg

+ kos-mos.jpg = t-elos.jpg

+ Tabby = Hideo

+ grunty.jpg = deathgrunty.jpg

Amusing Search Terms

The hilariously misdirected

dojin breath of fire cg game: does a doujin BoF game even exist?

A-Three doujinshi Evangelion: Yet another item I am not familiar with and have never mentioned on here.

The confusing

t: now back for its fourth consecutive week. Come on, someone, search for r or s instead.

You toube: to anyone still searching for this, I must at last enlighten you- it’s spelt “YouTube”.

you toube movee: even the classics must evolve if they wish to stay relevant.

fate/stay night tone: ?

The terrifying

None this week- what is the world coming to?

Honourable mentions

takamichi gay: at last, someone else noticed.

ginga nagareboshi gin anime blog: apologies to everyone searching for this, but episode 1 was as much as I could manage.

ouran ending disappointed: Hopefully this searcher was disappointed by the fact that Ouran was ending rather than by the last episode itself.

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