El Cazador de la Bruja parody episode 25

The final confrontation has arrived, and Rosenberg reveals that all he ever wanted was a passionate night with Ellis! Naturally, Nadie is unwilling to give up her lover, but who will be triumphant in the end?


Ricardo is recovering well after straining his hand during excessive Hyper Self Pleasure.


“Know that it has been coated with Teflon!”


Bee Train has a liking for phallic imagery.


“Stop trying to leave me behind just because I’m essentially useless!”


“This looks like the entrance to the final boss dungeon- I hoped you saved.”


“It took twenty-five episodes to get here, but now let’s finish this.”


“Marvel at my amazing fashion sense!”


“That’s just an old curtain, isn’t it?”


“Keep me alive, and I can tell you how to make your own.”


“…the pain of being trapped in an endless bus arc!”


“Inexplicable Final Boss shield powers!”


“Cameraman, stop zooming out!”

“I don’t know what you’re complaining about- you can still make out the characters if you squint at the screen.”


“And don’t let that blasted cameraman get away again!”


“At last, an opponent worthy of my skills- a rock!”


“Come on, this is the platforming section of the game.”


Press Circle+X+Square whilst holding down the R2 button and rotating the analogue stick 270° to perform this move.


“Gwakaka, now comes my favourite bit- the part where the villain explains his motives to the hero in unnecessary detail!”


“I just wanted to see if a man of HARD GAY could be turned STRAIGHT or BI!”


“…and became a woman trained in the arts of Pleasure!”


“Now you are the ideal woman I have seen in so many eroge!”


“Back off, she’s mine!”


“Ellis and I beg to differ.”


“Some may call it a rather extreme way to get rid of a romantic rival, but it seems perfectly sensible to me.”


“At long last I can move past phone and internet sex, and have the real thing!”


“The whole series was so boring that I can’t remember any of it!”


You may wonder why I bothered with this featureless white screen, but it is actually a statement as to how interesting the series as a whole was.


“Give me one last Gun for old time’s sake.”


“You know how bad my aim is!”


“You must do it before Rosenberg forces me to act out his kinky fantasies!”


Ah, the obligatory confession.


“I don’t want to have CORPSE!”


“I wasn’t actually wounded in any discernible way, but I shall die with you to provide a Romeo and Juliet style tragedy.”


“Why, Rosenberg? Why were our phone sessions never enough for you?”


“I have been mute all series, but now the plot will give me the power of speech!”


“I choose to save Ellis, since I’ve already slept with Nadie!”


“Well done- you made the right choice.”


“Now, what comes next in the villain’s manual? Ah yes, ‘blow up final boss dungeon, giving heroes scant minutes to get out’.”


“Aagh, falling rocks- this is just like when I run out of time in Utawarriors!”


“We can call it El Cazador season two!”


“Sorry, but Nadie is all I need!”


“Nadie!” “Ellis!” “Nadie!” “Ellis!”


“It isn’t over yet! If I get away, we can still have a second season!”


“I didn’t die either.”


“We, the clan of the witches, who spent the whole series in the shadows taking very little constructive action, shall now return to the shadows to take no action!”


“I hope no one noticed I dropped the camera.”


“Rosenberg, you can never beat the power of main character BI!”


“Aagh, the zoom button is jammed again!”


“Damn, my most dramatic moment and I choked to death on a glass of Ribena!”


“Was it wrong to want more than just phone sex?”

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